hermionemollycharliepond:

just-raowolf:

edenwolfie:

my year 8 students had to do a budgeting activity pretending they were living out of home on $2000 a month and I find this written on there help I can’t fucking breathe

We had to do this and I was partnered with a boy whose parents are a scientist and a doctor. My family spawned the book: Top Drawer Villain - autobiography of a London criminal.
First of all, we had to choose where we would shop. He wanted to buy from Booths. “We are not buying from Booths," I snapped. "Get on Asda’s website right now." His face froze.
“A-Asda?" he whispered. "But that’s where… The Lower Classes shop.”
This was a good start.
We then had to decide on a menu. We started on breakfast. “Toast," he said.
“Toast," I said. "Great. Look, Asda has its own wholemeal—”
“Warburton’s thick-slice white bread. Nothing else. With olive oil.”
“You WHAT?" I choked. "You have olive oil, on your toast, in the morning?”
He frowned. “Who doesn’t?”
“Okay," I said, "but what will the children eat?”
He gaped at me. “The children? We have children?”
We continued. All was well until it came to what we would have on our sandwiches. We even sorted out the children’s lunch - they, of course, would get free school meals. “Yes," he agreed; "if we can’t even afford Bertolli then they can get school meals on the government.”
He asked what dressing we should have on our ham. “Nuh-uh," I said. "Can’t have ham. I’m vegetarian.”
“But I’m not.”
“Yes, but we’re married and we can only afford one sandwich filler so it has to be vege—”
“We’re married!?”
“Of course we’re married! You’re devout Christian - how do you think I convinced you to have children?”
He shook his head, frowning. “Well I want ham. You’ll have to put back the washing powder - I need ham on my sandwiches.”
We continued. Finally, it was dinner. “Okay," he said, clearly thinking hard; "for dinner, we can have… Chicken nuggets and… Beans?”
“Vegetarian.”
“Vegetarian nuggets then. And beans.”
“We need vegetables. The children have to have a balanced diet.”
“You and your children!" he yelled, and the whole class looked around.
“They’re your children too!" I screamed back.
He leapt to his feet, shaking his head and looking distraught. “I don’t believe it - I don’t believe you! I wouldn’t have your children!”
“Please," I cried, standing up also. "Don’t—”
“I want a divorce!”
And he walked out of the classroom.
The teacher stood up and stared between me and the door through which he had vanished. “I’m sorry," I whispered, "but we couldn’t do it any more. There were just too many differences - I can’t live with someone who thinks champagne is a budget.”
I can’t wait to see this guy when he gets to university.

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hermionemollycharliepond:

just-raowolf:

edenwolfie:

my year 8 students had to do a budgeting activity pretending they were living out of home on $2000 a month and I find this written on there help I can’t fucking breathe

We had to do this and I was partnered with a boy whose parents are a scientist and a doctor. My family spawned the book: Top Drawer Villain - autobiography of a London criminal.

First of all, we had to choose where we would shop. He wanted to buy from Booths. “We are not buying from Booths," I snapped. "Get on Asda’s website right now." His face froze.

A-Asda?" he whispered. "But that’s where… The Lower Classes shop.

This was a good start.

We then had to decide on a menu. We started on breakfast. “Toast," he said.

Toast," I said. "Great. Look, Asda has its own wholemeal—

Warburton’s thick-slice white bread. Nothing else. With olive oil.

You WHAT?" I choked. "You have olive oil, on your toast, in the morning?

He frowned. “Who doesn’t?

Okay," I said, "but what will the children eat?

He gaped at me. “The children? We have children?

We continued. All was well until it came to what we would have on our sandwiches. We even sorted out the children’s lunch - they, of course, would get free school meals. “Yes," he agreed; "if we can’t even afford Bertolli then they can get school meals on the government.

He asked what dressing we should have on our ham. “Nuh-uh," I said. "Can’t have ham. I’m vegetarian.

But I’m not.

Yes, but we’re married and we can only afford one sandwich filler so it has to be vege—

We’re married!?

Of course we’re married! You’re devout Christian - how do you think I convinced you to have children?

He shook his head, frowning. “Well I want ham. You’ll have to put back the washing powder - I need ham on my sandwiches.

We continued. Finally, it was dinner. “Okay," he said, clearly thinking hard; "for dinner, we can have… Chicken nuggets and… Beans?

Vegetarian.

Vegetarian nuggets then. And beans.

We need vegetables. The children have to have a balanced diet.

You and your children!" he yelled, and the whole class looked around.

They’re your children too!" I screamed back.

He leapt to his feet, shaking his head and looking distraught. “I don’t believe it - I don’t believe you! I wouldn’t have your children!

Please," I cried, standing up also. "Don’t—

I want a divorce!

And he walked out of the classroom.

The teacher stood up and stared between me and the door through which he had vanished. “I’m sorry," I whispered, "but we couldn’t do it any more. There were just too many differences - I can’t live with someone who thinks champagne is a budget.

I can’t wait to see this guy when he gets to university.

READ THE WHOLE THING

“I crave touch, yet I flinch every time someone is close enough.”
- I have become rather fearful I suppose. (via needled)
terumiafuro:

terumiafuro:

i never posted this did i. well heres a picture of me writing pokemon au fanfiction in class

500+ fucking notes. this is incredible, will this be my legacy on these here tumblr dot coms

terumiafuro:

terumiafuro:

i never posted this did i. well heres a picture of me writing pokemon au fanfiction in class

500+ fucking notes. this is incredible, will this be my legacy on these here tumblr dot coms

twerkingderp:

iconic

partybarackisinthehousetonight:

never let your printer know that you waited until the last minute to print something and you’re in a hurry. they can sense fear

2-shane-s:

axelstiel:

DO YOUR PHYSICS, FUCKBOY

target confirmed missile inbound 

2-shane-s:

axelstiel:

DO YOUR PHYSICS, FUCKBOY

target confirmed 
missile inbound 

poemsingreenink:

hyenaspotz:

I DID meet a fake geek girl once. Turned out she was in fact an assortment of squirrels in a trenchcoat.

Those squirrels sure did know a lot about Batman, though.

This is the funniest thing I’ve read in years.

chicksdigthekarkat:

so we were painting pumpkins for the zoo today

chicksdigthekarkat:

so we were painting pumpkins for the zoo today

breadmaakesyoufat:

breadmaakesyoufat:

one time when i was 14, i pretended i was sick so i could stay home from school, i pretended i couldn’t talk, and i pretended to have a really sore throat, turned out my mum was really convinced and worried, so she took me to the hospital, i was very shocked when the doctor actually found out i had laryngitis. the next day i couldn’t talk and had a sore throat, oh irony, art thou a bitch.

image

stay home from school. save your own life.

thebetterrachel:

I can never not remember this whenever someone says “abort the mission”

20 hours ago with 518,829 notes

viciouscunt:

weed-plnts:

supramitch:

The car enthusiast, who is a member of the U.S. Military, hated the car’s silver color. One evening, he let his wife doodle on a few scratches on the bumper, and when the sun came up and he saw her stunningly intricate and elegant drawings, they knew they had to forge on. While he worked on tuning the insides, she drew on the car.

After roughly 100 hours of work and several clear coats to protect the design, they had an impressively beautiful car that they had tuned up as a team! (x)

i swear i saw this like YEARS ago, why did it only resurface now ? 

woahhhhhh hope he never sells that car

This is adorable and awesome

neilnevins:

image

kawaii-kekki:

hopehedgehog:

kawaii-kekki:

hopehedgehog:

is this…sollux?…
a friend of Korkat Vantos, perhaps. 

Why is vurska next to him

i totally did not notice that…what is this!??!

kawaii-kekki:

hopehedgehog:

kawaii-kekki:

hopehedgehog:

is this…sollux?…

a friend of Korkat Vantos, perhaps. 

Why is vurska next to him

i totally did not notice that…what is this!??!


I'm Kait and I sometimes draw things.

Any art in the #i've tried tag is mine.

Other Tags: i've tried, gif